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It's been more than a year and I'm still mad at you.

I still get this fear that builds in my chest and then I've to think about something else.

I want to just be filled with love, memories and kindness but maybe the truth is that this fear is a part of me now.

And now I know what it is like to be really mad.

I'm mad at you..

I'm mad at you because I've to be the sole keeper of all our memories..

I'm mad at you because I’ll never forget that day and a half..


It is not an easy story to tell, it’s a bit hard for me to put out, as you will soon read. But it is something I need to do.

Hello, I’m Shivani, about some time ago, I experienced the most profound loss in my entire life and that was the death of my best friend, I miss him every single day, and I think about all the things he should be here for that he’s just not. And this kind of grief is not something I ever expected to go through this young and even with the incredible love…

A letter to my best friend on the other side.

You’ve ditched me already. Bear with me this time even it’s going to be long or maybe forever. For the way you’ve gone, no punishment would compensate it ever. So today I’m breaking one of our promises too. Forgive me for doing that.

It isn’t intentional. I tried, i tried hard, i tried a lot. I just can’t keep a smile on my face like you wanted me to do. Everything seems empty and making me numb every time i think about you. I’m trying each day, talking to everybody…


I don’t have all the answers, but I try to bring the light

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